Welcome to Lead without Limits where I share unvarnished truths and actionable tips each week to help you traverse the often difficult terrain of work and life with more joy and energy.
Last week, I had the privilege of hosting Maia Molina-Shaefer for a Substack Live conversation that left me thinking bigger, dreaming bolder, and reconsidering what’s possible in my own career. Maia’s journey -- from boxing ring to combat zones, from military diplomat to nonprofit leader --offers a masterclass in navigating career transitions while staying anchored to your core purpose.
If you’ve ever stood at a career crossroads, wondered whether you’re “qualified enough” to make a leap, or struggled to maintain your identity through major transitions, this conversation is for you.
The Power of “Challenge Accepted”
Maia’s path to the Naval Academy didn’t follow the script she’d imagined. Despite being recruited for sports by multiple colleges and submitting what she thought was a strong application, she was rejected.
“It was a huge surprise and a shock to me when I actually didn’t get accepted. I wasn’t really used to being rejected or someone telling me, you’re not good enough to come to our school.”
Instead of internalizing that rejection, Maia used it as fuel. She spent an extra year at a foundation school, focusing on STEM courses, and reapplied. The second time, she got in.
Here’s what strikes me about this: Maia didn’t just persist blindly. She took that “no” as information. She identified what needed strengthening, invested the time to build those skills, and came back stronger.
Your Takeaway:
When you face rejection or a setback, ask yourself: Is this a hard stop, or is this feedback about what I need to develop? Sometimes the path to where you want to go requires a detour that actually makes you more prepared for what’s ahead.
Leading Through Listening
One of the most powerful themes in our conversation was Maia’s approach to leadership in unfamiliar contexts. When she arrived in Niger as the first woman to serve as Chief of Office Security Cooperation, managing a $240 million portfolio, she faced what many of us fear: being underestimated because of who we are.
“I was really worried that my gender was going to be my vulnerability. I thought it was going to be something that prohibited me from entering rooms that my predecessor had automatic open doors to.”
Instead of trying to prove herself through force or directness, Maia led with curiosity:
“I would sit down with them. I’m like, please tell me, what is your vision for your defense force? What do you think your capability gaps are? What do you think your strengths are? How can we as partners help you get there?”
The result? What she thought would be her weakness became her superpower. By listening first, she gained access to both the male military leadership and the women within the defense force, perspectives her predecessors couldn’t reach.
Your Takeaway:
When you step into a new role or environment where you feel like an outsider, resist the urge to immediately prove yourself. Instead, ask questions. Listen deeply. The trust you build through genuine curiosity will open more doors than credentials alone ever could.
SAVE THE DATE: Monday, December 22nd at 10am ET for a live conversation with Aamina Awan-Khan on “The Intersection of Identity and Purpose.” Aamina was the former Chief Partnerships Officer in the U.S. Department of State’s Bureau of Public Diplomacy and has held management roles with the Clinton Foundation, the United Nations and Credit Suisse AG. (Link to join)
The Identity Shift No One Talks About
One of the most vulnerable moments in our conversation came when Maia talked about switching from the Marine Corps to the Army after 10 years of service:
“I was really worried that when I took that name tag off that I wouldn’t know who I was. I had spent my entire career being a Marine officer, training to be one, hitting the highest standards to be as best as I could. And I loved being a Marine.”
This resonated deeply with me. I’ve witnessed so many leaders struggle with similar identity shifts: leaving a prestigious company, transitioning from corporate to nonprofit, stepping away from a title they’ve worked decades to earn.
But here’s what Maia discovered: “When I put on that Army uniform, I was like, oh, I’m exactly the same. Like actually nothing has changed about me.”
The uniform changed. The organization changed. The culture changed. But her mission, to serve her country, create opportunities for others, and lead with integrity, remained constant.
Your Takeaway:
Your identity isn’t your title or your organization. It’s the mission you’re committed to and the values you bring to every arena. When you’re clear on those, you can step into new contexts without losing yourself.
Communication Isn’t One-Size-Fits-All
Throughout her career, Maia has had to radically adapt how she communicates: from briefing generals in combat zones to negotiating with foreign military leaders in French to now working with nonprofit leaders in New York City.
She shared a funny example from her current role: “I will teach them a military term a week… I’ll walk in and say, OK, what’s the closest alligator to the boat? And they [respond with confusion in their eyes], what are you talking about?”
This isn’t just about learning new jargon. It’s about recognizing that effective leadership requires meeting people where they are, speaking in language that resonates with them, and being humble enough to ask when you don’t understand. And it means being willing to share the context of your language, too — that’s how you create authentic connection.
Your Takeaway:
As you move between contexts, whether that’s different departments, industries, or cultures, pay attention to how people communicate. What metaphors do they use? What matters to them? Your ability to translate your experience into their language will determine whether your expertise lands or falls flat.
The Myth of Being “100% Ready”
Near the end of our conversation, I asked Maia what she’d say to someone considering a big career leap. Her response was immediate:
“I feel, especially as women, we feel that we can’t take on a new opportunity or do something new unless we’re 100% prepared and ready to go. And I would say that a lot of these jumps that I took in these different arenas, I was not 100% ready to go, right? But I knew that once I got in there, I could learn.”
This is the permission slip so many of us need. We wait for certainty that will never come. We wait to feel completely qualified. We wait until the fear disappears.
Maia’s advice? “Comfort is the enemy of growth.”
She reminds her son daily:
“You have survived 100 percent of your hardest days.”
If you’re like me, you needed to hear this. I’m keeping this one on my “revisit weekly” list.
Your Takeaway:
Stop waiting to feel ready. If the opportunity aligns with your mission and values, if you’re willing to learn and have a support network to lean on, take the leap. The growth happens in the arena, not on the sidelines.
Building Trust Takes Time (and That’s Okay)
One insight that particularly struck me was Maia’s patience in building trust, whether with her diverse team in Niger or with military partners who weren’t used to working with a woman in her role.
“Trust, confidence and respect. It takes a lot of time to build that. And it comes with results. You have to prove yourself always.”
In our efficiency-obsessed culture, this can feel frustrating. We want to be direct, get to the point, make things happen fast. But Maia’s experience shows that sometimes the “efficient” path actually takes longer if people aren’t ready to trust you yet.
Your Takeaway:
When you step into a new leadership role, especially one where you’re breaking new ground, build trust before pushing for change. Show up consistently. Deliver on what you promise. Listen before you advocate. The relationships you build will determine what you can accomplish.
Translating Your Skills Across Arenas
Maia’s transition from military service to nonprofit leadership required more than just finding a new job. It required translating 20 years of experience into language and context that made sense in a completely different world.
“For veterans that are transitioning out of uniform, it’s really important to be able to translate your skills. We’re really good at listing off our technical capabilities... But that doesn’t work really well when I’m in a room full of nonprofit leaders.”
This applies to all of us navigating career transitions. Your skills are transferable, but you need to reframe them for your new audience.
Your Takeaway:
When making a career transition, don’t just list what you’ve done. Articulate what you’ve learned, how you think, what problems you solve, and how that applies to the new context. Your past experience is valuable. But only if you can help others see its relevance to their world.
Finding Your Mission, Not Just Your Next Job
What made Maia’s conversation so powerful wasn’t the impressive resume or the list of “firsts” she’s achieved. It was her clarity about her mission: creating pathways for others, serving with integrity, and being the best leader she can be while staying true to her values.
That mission has remained constant whether she was:
The first woman to compete in the Naval Academy’s brigade boxing championship
Managing a $240 million security cooperation portfolio in Niger
Teaching at West Point
Investing in women and girls as changemakers in New York City
Building a speaking and storytelling portfolio
The arenas changed. The mission didn’t.
Your Takeaway:
Before you make your next career move, get clear on your mission. What are you ultimately trying to accomplish? What impact do you want to have? When you’re anchored to that, you can evaluate opportunities not by title or prestige, but by alignment with what matters most to you.
Your Next Move
If you’re considering a career transition, feeling stuck in your current role, or wondering whether you have what it takes to step into a bigger arena, I want you to sit with this question:
What is your mission? Does it need to change or do you need to change the arena?
Before you worry about your job title, your industry, your specific role, clarify your purpose. It will be your guide as you figure out what needs to change and be your an anchor when everything else shifts.
For Maia, it was creating pathways for others and leading with integrity.
What is it for you?
And once you know that? As Maia says: “Be bold. You just never know what is going to happen unless you take that leap and you jump into it.”
You’ve survived 100% of your hardest days. You’re ready for the next arena.
If you felt inspired by her story and want to stay in touch, connect with Maia on LinkedIn or visit her at voiceinthearena.com
What resonated most with you from this conversation? Hit reply and let me know. I read every response.
Conversation Topics & Timestamps
Introduction & Background (00:00:00 - 00:05:10)
Maia’s journey from boxing to military service to nonprofit leadership
Growing up with a single mother in Buffalo, NY
The value of hard work and education instilled early
The Naval Academy Journey (00:05:10 - 00:09:00)
Being recruited for sports but initially rejected from the Naval Academy
Using rejection as fuel: attending foundation school and reapplying
Learning that persistence paired with strategic preparation opens doors
Boxing & Breaking Barriers (00:09:00 - 00:11:45)
Why boxing after 9/11: building physical and mental resilience
Becoming the first woman to compete in the brigade boxing championship
Petitioning for change and creating pathways for women who follow
First Combat Deployment (00:11:45 - 00:14:30)
Leading Marines in Iraq at age 22-23 for 15 months
Focusing on the team’s preparation rather than personal fear
Learning to put people first as a leadership principle
Becoming a Commanding General’s Briefer (00:14:30 - 00:19:12)
The power of being a good communicator and knowing your audience
Transitioning to aide-de-camp: shadowing C-suite level decision-making
How mentorship and sponsorship opened doors to become a Foreign Area Officer
Becoming a Military Diplomat (00:19:12 - 00:24:00)
Three years of training: master’s degree, learning French and Kiswahili
Traveling to 25 African countries to understand the landscape
How early opportunities create ripple effects throughout your career
Switching from Marines to Army (00:24:00 - 00:30:05)
The identity crisis of taking off the Marine Corps name tag
Realizing the mission stays the same regardless of the uniform
Balancing professional goals with personal life and family
Leading in Niger (00:30:05 - 00:41:00)
Managing a $240 million security cooperation portfolio
Turning perceived vulnerability (being a woman) into a superpower
Leading with listening: understanding your partners’ vision first
Pioneering the first Women, Peace, and Security program
Building trust through results and authentic partnership
Communication & Cultural Intelligence (00:41:00 - 00:45:00)
Adapting communication style across diverse teams
Leading with emotional intelligence and empathy, not just directness
The importance of timing in negotiations and relationship building
Transition to Education (00:45:00 - 00:46:30)
Teaching at West Point as a highlight of military career
Mentoring the next generation with the knowledge she wished she’d had
Retiring & Joining Nonprofit World (00:46:30 - 00:52:00)
Choosing purpose over profit after retirement
Finding Amplify Her Foundation: investing in women and girls in NYC
Translating military skills to nonprofit language
Learning to be humble and curious in a new arena
The Power of Storytelling (00:52:00 - 00:55:00)
Why storytelling matters: combating bias and creating connection
Representing female veterans and changing perceptions
Finding joy in unexpected places through shared stories
Advice for Taking the Leap (00:55:00 - 00:57:23)
You don’t need to be 100% ready to make a move
Comfort is the enemy of growth
“You have survived 100 percent of your hardest days”
The importance of doing something scary and trusting yourself
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I feature leaders each month in conversations just like the one I had with Maia. If you know of a leader or are one yourself that would be interested in having an open and honest conversation about your experience and expertise, please email me or send me a DM.
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May you lead without limits,
